Thursday, July 7, 2016

whoa is me

{photo circa: 2008ish}


pity parties. i don't have them too often and, they usually make me feel guilty. but. i had one yesterday. having everyone home 24/7 is getting a tad bit old. i feel like i'm running camp. make breakfast. clean up breakfast. do laundry. make lunch. clean up lunch. act as taxi driver. make dinner. clean up dinner. go to baseball. melt in the heat. walk the dog. melt some more. get everyone ready for bed. finally go to bed myself. repeat.  all of this, topped with a dose of PMS, brought me to a wall. i just wanted a moment to myself, without anyone needing or wanting something. {grant it, i do sneak away every morning for a work-out. i have to. it is my only bit of sanity}. so, i slipped into my craft room and sat in my cute, little chair - next to the window, with a stack of magazines. two minutes later...in comes cade...needing something. one minute later...in comes his sister. thirty seconds later...they start to fight. i lost it. {actually, i lost it with cade before she even came in the room. i even told him to go away. i know. mom of the year}. i just needed thirty minutes without picking up, cooking, answering questions, asking the same things to be done over and over again. was that too much to ask???

well, i didn't get the thirty minutes. but. i got over it.  and, although i have had to take several deep breaths...i have decided to be thankful for the work, the chaos, the frustration...the pity party.

having a constant open door to all of cade's friends drives me crazy at times {mostly because i am too much of a neat freak} but, i am one happy mama knowing he wants to be home and wants all of his friends over here.

taking care of mr. c has been a little bit exhausting but, he has been a great patient and, really...i wouldn't want anyone else taking care of him. {and, he has been very appreciative}. 

doing all the laundry, the cooking, the driving, the cleaning is getting super old...but, i bring it on myself. i don't {usually} ask for help and i love having a clean house and i prefer to do the cooking.  
however. i shared my pity party with my mom and guess who showed up the next morning with homemade enchiladas for dinner? that's right. my awesome mom. seriously. what would i do without her?

so, i guess there will be times when i hit a wall and even have a pity party now and then. sometimes, my family drives me crazy. they are spoiled rotten. but, i created the madness. i probably do too much for them. {and, my control issues do not help matters}. but, at the end of the day...i'm grateful for every minute and would not want anyone else doing my job.

{ok. ok. you probably wouldn't have to twist my arm to allow someone to clean my house}!


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